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Ever since my roommate has rushed into a "relationship", his behavior had changed for the stranger. He's become one of "those" people where his significant other only matters while everyone else is treated below him, more insulting towards me with his 'teases', doesn't really invite me anywhere much now that he has company (which I don't mind since I like having the house alone and I have places to go myself), and he's only known the guy for a month and a half and they're already spouting "I love yous" and he's talking about moving the guy in.

I've been playing most of it off and doing my own thing and have even been speaking to my ex and we've been rekindling things, which has been going well. But my roommate has been invasive, asking who's house I'm going to or where I'm at whenever I'm not home. One day I told him that I was going to see my second family, since that's what my ex's family are to me and I don't see a need for him to know all of my business, and I spend time with them, go to an interesting store, and post some funny photos with me and my ex on facebook messing around with some of the items or posing with items that we wanted to buy. My roommate goes into passive-aggressive mode and posts something about people blatantly lying when he knows they're "shady" or "liars" and then rudely asks if my ex was my second dad.

The next day, he pretty much messages me out of the blue and completely left field stating that he goes by the belief of not telling anyone's business if he knows it since it's not his to tell and if I know his business, if I could keep it to myself and, to be honest, I don't give a damn about his business. I just know it because he brings it around me. Then, a close friend of mine who has been like a mom to me and who knows my ex well asked if we were getting together, which I said that it was a work in progress and my roommate responds to my comment with a shocked face.

Now, I know that I shouldn't be too bothered by this considering that I've been doing my own thing and focusing on myself and what makes me happy, but what does concern me is him rushing into a relationship and wanting to move a guy in so soon, especially when he willingly invited another guy to mess around with (when I was home) because the guy he's interested in had to leave on emergency. I'm more than certain it's going to be a train wreck waiting to happen when the move occurs and I'll most likely be around it because I won't be able to move out fast enough. I'm also wondering why he's being so invasive with me as if he's obsessed, upset, or jealous when he has someone that he's dating?

in Friendship by (8,660 points)

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Hey Cyclosurge,

It'd definitely be interesting to get an update on this!

Sounds like your roommate is going through a weird phase and, unfortunately, you have to go with him. He sounds like he's being reckless, aggressive, nosy, paranoid. I'm guessing his relationship is less about love or connection and more about boredom and loneliness. Especially if there are both "I love yous" and cheating within the first couple months. Yikes!

Have you tried addressing these issues at all? Not sure if it'd be worth it or safe depending on if this person would flip out.

What age range are you guys in? Sounds very juvenile, like late teens or early 20s, but since you say roommate and move out I'm not sure if that's more mid-late 20s or older.

by (2,860 points)
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