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+4 votes
95 views

Hello. I am confused and don't know what to do. 

I sometimes send my boyfriend let's say "hot" pictures of me.

You can't see anything, everything is covered - but it's not like the pictures I want my parents to see, you know.

Previously he send one of these pictures to his co-workers and I saw it and kindly asked him not to do it again.

Now, he made one of these pictures his profile picture. 

He says I look beautiful and he just wants to brag or whatever. I don't like the cleavage hanging out, it's more a seductive picture than anything else I would say. 

Am I overreacting. :(

His one co-worker has his beautiful wife as his profile picture. I don't know if he is trying to brag to that guy or what he is trying to prove.

I just wish he could at least ask me first. 

in Dating by (350 points)

5 Answers

+5 votes

First, IMO he should have talked to you about it. That's what good relationship partners do. Therefore, you could talk to him about your feelings, and have him replace that pic with a picture you agree on. Everything will be alright with open honest communication. Here's to you both as you learn life and reasoning together!

by (461,200 points)
+2 votes

Some people are more laid back about issues like this than others. He probably doesn't think it's a problem. My Mom doesn't like any photos of her being put on The Net. Just politely explain to him and hopefully he will get it. And yes some people like to brag as they have a gf that is deemed hot. Personally I wouldn't.

by (4,336,111 points)
+3 votes

1.  Don't send ANYTHING to someone else unless you are willing to see it online for everyone in the world to see. That's -- unfortunately -- the world we live in today.  What is private between a woman and her partner becomes public property and sometimes even a post for ridicule or to embarrass the other when they break up.  If you get the urge to send him a revealing picture, call him on the phone and ask him to come over for a look...

2.  TALK to him plainly.  Tell him (a) If you ever post a picture of me on your social media, please check with me first; if you respect me, you'll respect my wishes.  (b) If you want me to continue to be your girlfriend, you'll pay attention to (a).  (c) If in doubt, refer to (a) and (b).

3.  If your boyfriend sloughs this off as "Aw, you're being too picky.  There's nothing wrong with those pictures, and you shouldn't complain because it's not a big deal..."  Then know this:  Your boyfriend doesn't really care about you. All he cares about is himself: how YOU make him look good; how he can brag to his buddies by saying "look how hot my girlfriend is--I must be pretty sexy to get someone that hot" (which, of course, isn't about you but about how hot HE is).  If he doesn't respect your wishes, he doesn't respect you--even if he truly believes it's no big deal... he'll take the pictures down and won't post more like them in the future.  Why? Because he cares about you.  If he WON'T, then he truly doesn't care about you.

BOTTOM LINE:  You'll find out very quickly what your relationship REALLY is with your boyfriend.

Best wishes!

by (968,440 points)
0

Media you nailed it!

But I always knew you were a classy guy!


0

Maybe I'm just so old I've learned some stuff... LOL

+1

Could be … but I def fit in the old category! Wish I’d learned more and hadn’t been so stubborn in my teens! Lol!

0 votes

He did this because he is immature and insecure. He is using you to validate a persona he wishes to project. This certainly has nothing to do with his love for you. As for his co-worker, you didn't describe the nature of the photo. Being beautiful is one thing and seductive another. Perhaps your boyfriend has delusions of being like Hugh Hefner with his playboy bunny. 

by (100 points)
0 votes

Your boyfriend is a dimwit and that's being kind. Get rid of him. He's a creep.

by (34,180 points)
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